Voted For: diman

Let me break this down...

diman: the strongest aspect of your piece was the emotion without a doubt and also the way you portrayed such emotional events, very creative in my opinion. I like strong emotion but sometimes it's too much you know, others would dwell in self-pity or focus on bad things but you reminisced the good memories as well. You found an excellent balance in your use of vocabulary, kept it easy to understand without it being basic. Flow was dope as well as structure, some multi's here and there. Made me think about some stuff here and there, like how you made a lot of links for instance "a comic even though she hated chapelle." It gives the piece something special I think. Some of my favo lines are the following:

praying my genes will multiply, places outside the pen.
i’ve lived in prejudice since ten, forever been apartheid sin.
parents never cared for marriage, loved they're heavenly hearts.
& they loved me in return, until death did them part.

Also the second part of that last sentece ("today i anticpate...which funeral the future brings") because it sums it all up in fact.


Dabatos: I also enjoyed reading your verse because it's very different which is quite logical since it's an autobiography. Like how you used a sort of introduction, especially the "But I don't ever want to go down in history with no name" because I think that's something many of us can relate to. Your emotion was good as well even though I got the feeling you could've gone more into detail here and there. You left me questioning what struggles exactly you went through and I don't get why you started talking about God there but didn't continue or use this later on. I like the last part best because it's clearly about one important aspect of your life, one struggle (people acting like they're better and such, racism, prejudices...). But I feel your emotion could've been a whole lot better, no hate...Structure, vocab and flow were all nice though. Favo lines are these:

It would be a lie, if I said that I always wanted no fame..
It would be a lie, if I said, that my life always had no shame..
It would be a lie, if I said, that I’ve lived through the dope game..
But I don't ever want to go down in history with no name

In the end, my vote goes to diman for the stronger emotion. Dabatos, no hate man...I liked your verse as well but diman's was more indepth in my opinion.

Bank account Dab: XPETBK-27926

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