Thread: Cenile Keystyle
View Single Post
Old 04-25-05, 12:48 PM   #2
Calm
Divine Ascension
 
Calm's Avatar
 
Posts: 310
From: Eye of The Storm
IP:

ummm not really feelin this one.. u need work on ya word play and metas. your usage of multis needs work as well. just rhymin words to match doesnt work. and ya bar structure is foul. its hard to follow the rhyme scheme the stretched lines fuck up the scheme as well.
__________________



-Transcending The Heavens-
I am before before...
Before death is eternity, After death is eternity.
There is no death, only eternity.
And I be riding the wings of eternity...



___________________________________________


3 Poems.:.3 Features.:.3 Weeks Consecutively
I'm a Bad Man
Send a message via AIM to Calm   Reply With Quote