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IP:
Hmm.. This was an iight peice...
Structure was good , You had some nice
Wordplay , pretty decent vocab from murdz..
Nice topic, both really had the concept good..
Unregistered, you really need to elevate on your structure
and use more emotions , and feeling... try to use more poetic
words to try and make imagery..and make the reader want
to read more and more...
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The Competition
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