Voted For: Tekneek

idrty fucka, kickin'-spittin' nothin' but grimey,
You can just-try-me, end-up dead-up, behind-me./
^6self glorifing
"Iron casket","death-inpenetrable" any less-unaccept-able, mind, lyrical re-cep-ticle./ You got "Chest-i-cles", from bullets holes-cold, drippin'-and-frozen, cut off your "little-testicles" and go-"kiddie-bowlin'./ I'm str8 control-lin' any siteation that I'm thrown-in, scarier than barbarian like that homey-Co-nan./ Holy-rollin' like an O.G. ghost wit da-most-flava, don't need a favor I see through you-like-a-laser/ elec-tric frequencies hit ya-neck like a taser, like you were met-wit-your fate-son you just sweat-'til-the-day-comes./I spray-gunz...
But only in a, ly-rical-sense, shootin' up the paper, like I had "clips-in-da-pens" If its a-hit-it-depends on your ly-rix-and-your-friends- cuz if you don't have the love, you ain't SHIT -to-the-end. I'm spit-tin'-again cuz i'm high-and-i'm-dazed, love for the spits, thats why-I-get-blazed! ...

I ain't gon bother breakin it down because I can;t.U strucutred ur verse terribly.Don't make it like a paragraph.And ease up with the self glorify talk.Stop talkin about killin him.....just diss.Save that murder shit for open mic.


i bet you can't stand~me~fool, have ya ass-gone when ya rapz get 'passed~on' more than 'family~jewelz'!,
she got a man~to~pull? nah she be pullin~ho's and even if she wore 'panty hose' she ain't 'full~of~flow',
^^Ok....but the bar didn;t connect
this hoe don't get it? i'ma leave you~hintz, but you should of knew~since i was 'drawin ya plan out' like 'blue~printz',
you might as well not bring~a~spit cuz you ain't gettin da 'upperhand' if i gave you mah 'finger~tipz'!,
^^OK
linger~bitch but you wrong if you think you~in~this cuz i'ma leave ya 'strugglin' like a new~business,
you~win~this?, she could be 'attached to a kicked down door' and still not be 'off a few~hinges'!!,
^^weak
believe~ya~rhymez? nah they just seedz~of~lies, leave you 'round faced' like i tried to feed~you~pies!,
^^OK
you need a breather~guy...oh you a woman right, well what does she think about 'womenz rightz'? she likes 'either~side'!!!
^^mediocre

Ur verse was not hot by any means.But compared to the other guy...it's a mastrepeice.Stop with the "~" bullshit.Just write ur shit normal.Upp ur werdplay too.But u got this.I'd be surprised if you don't KO.

Vote-Teekneek(vote in link below please)
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=196901