i kind of got mixed feelings from this piece. The flow was a bit off and the structure was ok. The rhyming scheme was off at parts which threw off the flow. The topic was good but at the end you mixed it with killing little kids. Try raising up your vocab and making this intoa whole song, if you can keep it on topic and not talk baout saving lives then killin kids. It don't match like that. Try also to raise the syllables in your rhymes. Keep it up tho and return the favor.