Voted For: blackfrostbite

yo,imma say dis holmes,warnin don't read da contents/
you think you got issues,but when im done you gone have real conflicts/
^^^2nd line stretched out and wasn't a punch
man imma read off ya problems ponder on dis/
first you gay like XXX-rated con sex/
^^Please make your lines rhyme
you still locked up in my battle zone/
when you step over here im gone call you prison song/
^^Please make your lines rhyme
but on da real one conflict you aint got to worry bout is yo death/
cuz from da looks at it, der aint nuthin left/
^^finnaly a bar that flows...but it sucks

Next time...make sure all your lines rhyme.Try to *Gasp* get a punchline too.Get rid of the newb structure.Remove stretched lines.Get some personals.Bassically....improve in everything.

Lets prepare/fo’ dis rap game warfare/and if u dare/
Test my gats/I put da pussy in cats/
^^^wow......whack
I got da lyrical key/ull wanna kiss me/
Ill make dis dis whack emcee lose control worse dan missy/*
^^whack
I think u betta mello out/and stop trashin about/
Dis site is fo’ good emcees and dats somethin ur without/
^^^whacker.....
Ima masta piece/ill take dis battle wit ease/
I heard dis nigga blow more shit than christopher reevees/
^^PLayed and whack

MY god....I thought FrostBite was bad...but you were somehow worse.You had no punchlines either...but the differnce is that Frost actually seemed to try.You bassically had no structure.No flow.No nothing.

Vote-BlackFrostBite
VOTE IN LINK BELOW OR THIS VOTE WILL BE REMOVED
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=201803