blah, although structure doesn't matter, a good one helps with the read of the piece, getting involved and what not........so i will complain about that, cause ubsurd is a good writer, just needs to structurize, define some lines.....but none-the-less, his parts were good, next i liked spoken's, like his metas........artik yours wasn't bad, i dont like how you do uneven syllable rhymes on the same line, a couple times it happened, but hey, im picky......just disrupts a good flow, word......second paragraph was better

so overall, this was a solid piece, good idea, long, but a worthy read.......keep up.

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