The Paragraph President
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IP:
damn man very good imgery, but somin you need to work on is emotion, flow could be better stucture is very good, the vocabulary was decent but i'd like to see you get more poetic but in this case in the topic and the story you have i dont think it'd work out, it'd wreck your story probably but overall im feelin this very good om man, keep it up man this one is fuckin long as hell too.
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