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Old 08-17-05, 11:10 PM   #11
noname
Coming to Kill you All
 
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Voted For: BLACK~MAGIK

Faggot, ya rhymes is wack, everything you write is trash
Seriously, How am I gonna be intimidated......................
...........................By a man who hides behind a mask??*
^^coulda made a play of it better....4/10
Look fam your just wack, ya amatuer raps cant damage this cat
And fuck batman, I'll run up and hit this man with a bat!!
^^not much of a diss....1/10
Nothing about you is fierce, kid, there's no doubt that your queer
When the tightest thing about you, is the outfit you wear!**
^^Lmao....nice....8/10
You're old and weak...Souldier? Please, I expose emcees
And got got time, for your rhymes, like I'm being charged roaming fee's
^^hmm...ite...4/10

OK...decent verse.Had some nice internals n shit so flow was good.Best line you had was the the tightest thing he has is his outfit.I think that 1st bar coulda been better.U had a good concept with the hiding behind mask shit..but you didn't execute it well enough.And that 2nd bar ...not a punch.But overall..decent verse.

your a lyricall disaster,im a rymin master,to win this battle u gotta be a spell caster
^^Ok punch..but erase the filler n word it better..4/10
you say that ur magik but im the real wizard,i frezze in ur traks like a god damn blizzard
^^No punch...0/10
i come and wreck ya fuckin hood,i got the skillz that u wish u could
^^No punch...0/10
ur tryin to hard dawg u need to keep it simple,ill pop ya pussy ass like a god damn pimple
^^no punch...0/10
u think ur hard cuz ur black but harder and im white,ma rymin skillz are tighter than tight
^^no punch...0/10
ull git so pissed ull shit urself like cheddar bob,ill chew u up like corn on the fuckin cob
^^not much of a punch still...0/10
if i hurt ur feelins i dont feel too bad,i didnt mean to make u that god damn madd
^^no punch..0/10

OK...first off...structure your verse better next time.Make it in bar couplets.Don't d it like this next time.And stop saying shit just because it rhymes..that'd get you nowhere.And do you even know what a punch is?Go to tutorials and find out what one is.Cuz apperantely you don't know.It's all about wordplay and metas.

Vote-Black Majic
RTF
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=203772
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