nice piece........... good emotion and imagery............ rhyme scheme turned me off a little, bcuz sometimes it seemed like your last words in a line were mostly there just to make it rhyme (like the 'fishin at a pond'......'seeing reflections of how u were bad'.....'robbed me of my essence')........ a lot of metas seemed forced, which wasn't neccesary in a piece like this....... still thiz was a great piece, i'd give it an overall 8.5/10....... keep writing........

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"I don't want to be deep... I want to feel deep and use that feeling to express depth itself..."
-Konchance

my poetry:
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