Hm, although I did like the majority of the piece at times it felt like you were trying entirely to hard to fit all kind of intense vocab into each line. And that resulted in extreeeeeeeemely strechted lines, and a page of words that will float above most of this sites heads.

Another thing that I really didnt like was how BOTH of you just completely ripped you storylines from the track lists of Tupac. Both seeing Brenda, and immediatly thinking of 'Brenda's Got A Baby' and going with that. I mean, 'Brenda' for a topic is stupid anyway. But I mean, something that generic could have been brought ANYWHERE in terms of story... And had you guys thought outside of the box I think I would have enjoyed your pieces much more.

But on a more possitive tip... Your flow was rediculous, very nice. With shorter lines this would have been amazing regardless of the storyline. So ya, just tryn fix those few things and I'd be a fan.