I actually liked this piece. The wording and structuring had just a subtle and eloquent delivery. Which, in my eyes was the overall theme of the story... 'Tastefull/Classic Beauty'.

The emotion, it wasnt ever really overtly pressant to me. It was more just a calming tone placed upon something not so calming... Which I liked. Nothing was ever to over the top, but then again it never once had to be to fit with the theme you had. The only thing at times that I would have liked would be more creative and just stronger metaphors.

But ya, everything was pretty nice actually. Structure very modestly, effectively used the line breaks. Uuuuum ya, overall nice poem. And do you think you could return the favor and check out my poem 'The Answerless Questioning'? Im not getting all that much feedback on it so i'd really apreciate your response.