Voted For: Ysdat

Ysdat
good peice.I esspecially liked the multis in there,that's what I liked most.The idea was good,description and everything ,w/e..was ite..

My only advice would be to cut back on vocab,it makes ya shit sound awkward..Like,for instance

vacating my room, rapid run like satan will loom, I reach the top of the stair

^I understand the satin will loom,vacating my room internal..but c'mon.Rapid run?That part sounded bad.Pissed me off to be honest! ..LoL.

Dopium

Unlike Ysdat,you didn't have any multis.U had a basic rhyme scheme..and your lines were long.Stretched lines pisses me like nothing else -_-.
The idea and everything was ok.Nothing creative...meh..you lost...

Vote-Ysdat

Ysdat,PLEASE drop an honest vote in the link below...
http://community.rapverse.com/showthread.php?t=213623