^ he's right you're sturcture's not hott... makes your lines look very unorganized... and from what I can see it doesn't look like you flow with any kind of cadnace... which means ya flows off... lyrically there really wasn't anything in this that really stands out... you do have inter-connecting rhymes... but no really hard hitting or simple ruthlessly harsh lines... nothing that'll make someone stop and be like damn that was a hot ass bar...

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