RapVerse.com Community - View Single Post - first poem...written @ 3am...its wack but leave feedback plz

nice peice
better than what I thought it was goin be
alot of personal lyrics like you gettin some shit off ya breast..I mean chest.
rhyme scheme was basic, but you make up for that in content
I feel ya pain too. especially this part;

the shape of my eyes the contour of my jaw//
the curve of my hips//
softness of my skin and lips//
feeling even uglier after pretty niggas throw compliments//

^I can relate to that part. no homo
SMH, keep strong, girl.
lol, but yeah, this would be decent if it was audio, cos it flowed quite well.
but ummmm, thats it.
oh, next time lose the slashes..

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Quote:

Originally Posted by strobe

If you do kegel excercises, you would be able to do something similar without having to hold your tip shut with your hand. After you've been doing them, hold off ejaculating as long as you can to really let the pressure build and then aim for your girlfriend's eye and let 'er rip.. You might get lucky and shoot her eye out. That's probably exaggerating it a bit, but it will still be hilarious