View Single Post
Old 01-28-06, 10:38 PM   #26
Sean Gunner
GG Haterz
 
Sean Gunner's Avatar
 
Posts: 6,387
IP:

Voted For: o.O

Apparition
Wack verse? I Chew-Those, a body bag? Who-Knows!/
I run Through-Hoes, like a "0" in ya name i got You-Froze//*
No punch, just self glorification.
I Pop-Ammunition and Drop-Competition/
I gotta Cop-Recognition, cuz you can't Stop-Apparition//
Self glorification.
Get ready cuz you dont Know-the-Devil/
Its like you swimming in da Dead Sea cuz you Below-my-Level//**
Meh, first line was a filler, punch was ok, not creative though.
I need a Shot-at-Fame, dont be mad that i Bought-you-Shame/
Plan it out you need a Plot-to-Aim, its like im battlin myself cuz you aint Got-a-Name//***
Concept was very weak, punch was bad.
Leave you speechless as if i Threw-ya-Breath/
Im like your heart mutha fucka the way i beat You-to-Death//****
Self glorification.

Overall, you really only had one decent punch, rest was self glorification and mindless babble. Work on making every line count, and also using better concepts.

o.O
Say whatever you want kid, but Imma tell you now I ain't listening
And battling you is like battling air, cuz nothing seems to be hittin me
Played concept, wording was bad.
This battle is plain black and white....even more so then Ricky and Lucy
Makin "dough rise"? NAH...only this "baker's" AVATAR can afford Gucci
Concept is played, punch is blah.
Feeling like a diamond in the rough? Well they say diamonds are forever
Drink 'dabeers' vomit and the clean floor is the only shine you'll have ever*
Wording was really bad, concept was ok. Punch was bad.
Fuck this "donkey" face....he "can't think" for himself...he is a "dumb ass"
I mean when his mom's "ready" this redneck is already ready to "cum fast"
Mom punches = no
Next time you want to step...make sure you know who you be dissin
Cuz your at a loss for words...like a thesaurus with all its pages missin!
Punch was blah, concept was blah.

Overall, you are quite basic I feel. You are decent, but you really need some help and elevation. Work on more original concepts and wordplay, and leave an explanation for certain punches like sig and avatars, cuz we can't see his av or sig.
--------------------
My vote goes to o.O for a better verse and more punches. Both of you need to elevate and start using better personals and concepts.

v- o.O
__________________

Quote:
Originally Posted by Twisted Visions
50 nickle=less than 50 cent, go back to school you idiot
Seangunner@gmail.com
For Anyone Who Wants to Talk to Me

^^I think this explains my view on gangster rap perfectly.