Lotta vocab in this some of it poorly worded, and just flat out ocward... with all the vocab invovled shoulda had a lot more multies in this... didn't flow as smoothly as most vocab rich open mic would... imagery was kinda lacking... this was too short for the concepts you were working with... didn't go into much detail on any aspect... very vague gloss over... I'd like to see you do a more detailed version of this... as is it's like and outline to what should be dropped... good ideas, just not the most accurate layout of them ... feel me?
RTF
7 Deadly Sinz