RVW
February 18th, 2006
Chicago, IL
*crowd erupts as fireworks go up and theme song winds down*
N.Tavarez: Welcome ladies and gentlemen, I'm N. Taverez and these are my co-commentars Red Bull and Spektikul. We're here in Chicago, Illinois for the opening show of what promises to be a great run for RVW. Grab a hold of your seats, because it's gonna be one hell of a ride!!
*"Click Click BOOM!" by Saliva starts playing as the crowd goes crazy*
N.Taverez: Here he is people! The founder of the RVW, and co-owner, SPuL! I can't wait to see what he has to say, can you guys?
Red Bull: *throws bottle down towards ground* whaaaa? Mayn-
Spektikul: BOOBIES!!!!!!! HAHAHAAHAHA!!!!
N. Taverez: umm..... I'm guessing my co-commentators are a little too drunk. It just goes to show you how excited some people really are about this!
*SPuL, with the KORV 3 belt on his left shoulder, continues walking down towards the ring with a mic in his hand. Donned with a black tuxedo that would make James Bond get green with envy. Crowd starts chanting.. "DEATTHHHHHHHHHH JIZZZZZZZ!!!!! DEATHHHHHHHH JIZZZZZ!!!!"*
SPuL: *clears throat, and crowd instantly goes silent* Before we start, let me introduce my partner in this great business. Without further ado.......
*lights go out, smoke starts rising from the stage and a spotlight moves around until it focuses on the stage*
SPuL: Ladies and gentlemen, the only King on RVW..
*yells* KINGGGGG SOLOOOOO!!!!!!!!
*"Move Bitch!" by Ludacris starts playing and the crowd erupts*
N.Tavarez: Yes people, SPuL's partner in crime, the King himself……King Solo. This should prove to be an entertaining kick-off to RVW, it always is when these two are in the ring at the same time. Red, Spek……what do you think?
Red Bull & Spektikul: MOVE BITCH!! GET OUT THE WAY!!! MOVE BITCH!! AHHHHH!!!!!
N.Tavarez: Righttt... Well it doesn't look like we'll be getting anything coherent out of my co-commentators right now, so I guess I'll be doing all the talking………but then, we all know that ain't a bad thing at all!!
*King Solo wearing one of his Armani suits walks to the ring, stops by a hot woman and gets a kiss from her, King Solo tosses her a quarter and gets into the ring*
SPuL: Now that we're both here, we can get this show on the road.
King Solo: *interrupts SPuL before he speaks again* Before we do, I wanna say something. Ya see, I couldn't help but notice you're still carrying around that KORV 3 Championship Belt. So I gotta ask ya, how does it feel carrying around somebody else's belt?
*crowd responds with a flurry of "ohh"*
SPuL: *laughs* This coming from the man who couldn't even make it past the... what was it? second round? In like three tries? haha... the last time I had someone else's belt anywhere next to me was my dad's belt, when I was four years old, after performing a DDT on my 2 yr old brother.
*crowd erupts with laughter*
King Solo: *laughs* Actually, I got to the third round this time. But hey, that meaningless little tournament could only hold my greatness for so long. And besides, I don't pay people to kiss my ass like you.
*continues on before SPuL can talk* But let's not focus on that now, we've got a show to run.
SPuL: *laughs* Was it $20 or 25 that I gave you? Anyways... you've all probably seen the ads the past few weeks. Otherwise you all wouldn't be here.... Heck, in the middle of that BORRRRINGGG halftime performance by the Rolling Stones, the Super Bowl committee cut to one of our ads.
*laughs* Don't tell anyone, but the guy who works their.... ehh..... kind of bends both ways if you know what I mean....
*starts to whisper* TRANNY!!!! And I had proof
*mixed reaction from the crowd, including laughter and many stunned looks*
King Solo: Bends both ways huh, sounds like somebody I know.
*points to SPuL* Anyway, lets talk about some serious business. You know I'm not one to drag things on, so how about we just get right down to announcing the rosters for each show.
*crowd starts to stand, all interested*
SPuL: *laughs* Sorry to tease you like that. But those will be announced later on in the show.
*crowd starts to boo* Hey, if that's how it's gonna be, maybe we could wait till next week?
*boos grow louder as SPuL grins* hahaha.... well, first things first... RVW will be separated into TWO separate brands. One brand will be viewed on Mondays, not tommorow, but next Monday. And the other will be viewed on Friday. The names are as follows: Monday Night Mayhem, hosted by yours truly, and Friday Night Fever, hosted by this big lug over here.
*points to King*
King Solo: Sorry folks!! I guess you'll have to wait to see who will be featuring on which show. I think that SPuL is feeling just a little bit insecure, what with his roster looking a little 2nd rate when compared to the ENORMOUS stars that will be exclusive to my show.
*crowd laughs*
SPuL: *laughs* don't make me go all death jizz on you now son.
*makes humping motion with body. "Death Jizz" chants start going through the crowd* Haha... but speaking of rosters....
*"Praise" by Sevendust starts playing.... Crowd doesn't know whether to cheer or not*
N.Taverez: OHH BOY!!! WHO COULD THIS BE?!?!
Red Bull: HEEE HONNNNNK!!!!!!!
*nobody comes out. Crowd is booing. SPuL is smiling as King Solo is looking confused. All of a sudden, crowd starts cheering loudly*
Mimesis: *behind King Solo* BOO!!!!!!!!
*King Solo jumps back. Crowd laughs*
SPuL: *big grin* haha, let me introduce to everyone. The NUMBER ONE!!!!!!! DRAFT PICK!!! OF RVW!!!!!!! And the first member of Mondayyy NIGHT MAYHEM!!!!! MIMESIS!!!!!!!!!!
*crowd cheers*
Mimesis: *eats pancake and spits it out at feet of King Solo* Fever ain't got shit on Mayhem, pal.
*Leaves ring* OHHHH....... and one more thing....
*Solo turns around* You're a little tense, I think you need some fresh air.
*winks, and turns and heads towards exit. Hopesfall runs into ring behind Solo, and pulls his pants down. Crowd erupts with laughter. Hopesfalls quickly proceeds to dash to exit after mimesis*
SPuL: *laughs* oh, man, you're on the clock, cheif.
King Solo: *pulls pants back up and just laughs* Nice SPuL, that's real nice. I can see that you're looking all smug like you've got one over on me. But ya see, I kinda figured that you'd pull something like this. So………allow me to introduce my back up plan.
N.Tavarez: OH MY GOD!!! THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!! But, what on earth does King Solo mean by back up plan.
Spektikul: I can't feel my legs!! HICCUP!!!
*"Checkmate" by Apathy starts to play. The crowd waits to see who will come out.*
N.Tavarez: WHO COULD THIS BE?? We've already had Mimesis and Hopesfall out here.
Red Bull: MOVE BITCH!!! HICCUP!!
*passes out*
*The crowd explodes into a frenzy as local RVW wrestler 9th Degree enters rolling out two car wheels, SPuL looks confused*
King Solo: That's right people, THE REAL DEAL OF RVW!!! EXCLUSIVE ONLY TO FRIDAY NIGHT FEVER……………9TH DEGREEEEEE!!!
*"Checkmate" fades out and "Lean Wit It, Rock Wit It" starts playing. The crowd is still cheering, and they get louder as Fux walks out also rolling two car wheels with him.*
King Solo: OH YEH!!! THE TALENT KEEPS ON COMING!!! THE SECOND STAR THAT WILL BE ON FRIDAY NIGHT FEVER……………LADIES AND GENTLEMEN PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER FOR…………………FUX!!!
N.Tavarez: MY GOD!!! 9th Degree and Fux on the same show, King Solo has hit the jackpot with these two picks.
*King Solo quiets the crowd as the music stops*
King Solo: Now, I know a lot of you are probably wondering why 9th Degree and Fux have brought out wheels. Well allow me to direct your attention to the big screen.
*points to STAGE SCREEN which shows a backstage camera looking at a limousine with "SPuL" written on the side and the limo has no wheels. crowd goes crazy*
King Solo: So, all I've got to say to you SPuL is………………enjoy the walk back to your hotel.
*Crowd starts laughing as "Move Bitch" starts to play, King Solo drops mic and leaves the ring laughing at SPuL as he walks backwards up the ramp. SPuL looks furious, as he reaches inside his pocket for his cell phone. He calls somebody*
SPuL: It's time..... yup.... ok.. bye
*closes cell phone* Anyways... this looks to be a promising show that should have you glued to your seats every Monday and Friday. The rest of the draft results can be seen on
www.rve.com as well as which brand gets what title. But as for now, I'd like to direct you all to the jumbotron
*laughs*
N.Taverez: Oh, boy.. what could this be? Let's find out!
*King Solo is seen strutting towards the parking lot towards his limousine. He goes to open the door into the parking lot, but instead walks into the room where he meets Kool-col-b. crowd starts going crazy since it looks like he is jacking off to a big poster of Eazy-E.*
King Solo: What the
*BEEP!!!* are you doing?!?!
Kool-Col-B: What's up my spicca?
*he turns around and he's just cleaning his sunglasses, crowd explodes with laughter. He puts on his sun glasses* werd
King Solo: oh, geeze...
N.Taverez: HAHAHA!!! We'll be seeing a lot of this on Fever, I guarantee it!!
*Solo goes out door, and finds parkin' lot. And walks toward his limo. He goes to open the door, but finds out it's locked.*
N.Taverez: Uh-oh!!! Has the Spulster possibly pulled another one on the King?
*Window of limo slides down, only to show Hopesfall. Crowd erupts. Hopesfalls then pulls out a squirt gun and sprays Solo in his face. Crowd starts laughing, as the limo pulls away. King Solo looks pissed as his cell starts to ring.*
SPuL: *On Cell* hey, Solo, I guess you'll be joining me on my long walk, huh? That's pretty nice, since we got A LOT to discuss.
*laughs as Solo looks pissed and smashes camera to ground*
*"Click Click Boom" starts playing as SPuL makes his way out of the ring. He stops at the end of the ramp, and makes humping motion. Crowd reacts with "DEATH JIZZ" chants. SPuL grins, and exits*
N.Taverez: THERE YOU HAVE IT FOLKS!!!! The first RVW show is in the books. What a show it was. I can't WAIT..... for next week. Should be a helluva show!
Spek: *makes finger into a gun shape and points towards his head* CLICK CLICK BOOM!!!!!
*falls over*
N. Taverez: Man, I'm so glad these clowns won't be joining me next week on Mayhem. Well, till then-OH WAIT!! What's this?!?
*Crowd cheers as it shows Mimesis walking thru the hall. He goes to open the door to the locker room, but it swings open, and JTR walks out. Crowd cheers louder. They just stare at eachother for a few moments. Then mimesis walks by JTR into locker room knockin' his shoulder into JTR. JTR just looks back, and shakes his head and walks down the hall*
N. Taverez: OH boy, that was intense!!! You can see the hatred in each of their eyes toward the other one. Could this be foreshadowing what's to come in the future of the RVW? Tune in next week to find out!! I'm N.Taverez, signing out!! Goodnight everybody!!
www.RVE.com exclusive
Mayhem
1. mimesis
2. JTR
3. Enygma
4. Lady Fiya
5. Indeph
6. Lola
7. Paramik
8. Hopesfall
9. Decree
10. Cinematic.
11. Morpheus
12. The Law
13. Jae
14. L*F*S*
15. Prozak
Fever
1. 9th
2. Fux
3. Kool
4. Gkillah
5. L.I.
6. Emit
7. Wicked One
8. K.P.
9. Knight
10. Untold
11. Too Easy
12. MC Wicked
13. T. Skillz
14. Young Dollar
15. Chronic the Hemphog
TITLES
Mayhem
RVW Champion
The People's Tag Team Champions
Intercontinental Champion (To be Renamed)
RVW Women's Champion
Fever
The People's Champion
RVW Tag Team Champions
US Champion (To be renamed)
Cruiserweight Champion (To be Renamed)