Not bad man, ur flow was aight and ur vocab was ok. U should try to increase ur vocab a little bit. For better flow add multies and internal rhyming, but it was a nice topic, something a lil different. But it says u did it quick so maybe u write alot better than this. But please rtf on one of my om's if u havent already. Im hoping to see u soon drop something that u put a lot of work and time, emotion and imagery into it. Peace.