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Old 04-12-06, 05:08 AM   #9
David Lama
oh yea?
 
Posts: 547
IP:

Please homey save that trash, and just thank God you alive everyday that pass.
Ya bars is garbabe and ya words is to gay, so put ya rap books on the curb on tuesdays.
what does one thing have to do with the other, nothing really lol.. anyways this was weak man. and please make your lines shorter. or structure it better like this.

Please homey save that trash,
and just thank God you alive everyday that pass.
Ya bars is garbabe and ya words is to gay,
so put ya rap books on the curb on tuesdays.


it reads better like that man. even does it still sucks. its just easier to the eyes. you feel me?


Stop tryin to get signed and quit from the game, cause ya manager ain't doin shit but gettin you played,
this was weak, worded badly. and came off as fillerish. your thoughts werent delivered correctly here

Tech Skills never better change ya name, cause i really got a tech that a blaze ya brain,
too simple. a guy named tech must get lines like this all the time, so yea this didnt do anything

cause Doc Holiday hot the phrase that pays, i end ya text career in a major way,
fillerish. no punch

the champ is here, i ain't talkin bout Jada, so play the sideline and keep callin out hater,
this was just whack, no other way to say it. you need to be creative dude. so far you havent been.

cause nigga you the worst you the wackest you the korniest, Doc gone exploit it bitch Tech can't afford to slip,
filler

so write a korny diss put it on the forum, let the readers peep it watch em all die of bordem,
another filler line. no punch. come on man

and rapverse dot com get shut down quick, cause a korny nigga name Tech Skills couldn't spit,
again filler.

No i don't know you I'm just callin a spade, this is a part of the game so pardon the pain,
again filler.

but don't come back wit da garbage agane, homey just remember that the hardest is named..........................
Doc Holiday
again filler.

sorry for being harsh, just being honest.

keep elevating dude.
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