I saw this and thought fuck it, I haven't written a story in ages, I might as well do one now. Funnily enough, it came to EXACTLY 900 words. Enjoy.

The cab driver swung left then swerved right before changing gears and parallel parking into the adjacent spot. Mike, as his birth certificate stated, enjoyed conversing with his customers about matters ranging from life and death to weather and music. The small matter that he had previously been a mute hadn’t stopped him, as he’d trained his vocal muscles at an alarming pace that was soon stunning doctors from all nations. Chinese, Japanese, English, American, German, they were all in awe of Mike’s slow yet superb improvements in his speaking. Considering that being diagnosed a mute is a condition that you are not meant to come back from, this made Mike all the more special. Combining his story with the fact that he was a charming cockney made Mike a celebrity, something that he had never expected. And while he enjoyed the money, the riches, the fame and even the women, he still hung on to his old job driving his cab. Whilst he was definitely loved by many, there were still a few harbouring resentment towards him due to his achievements. They were a group who self proclaimed themselves “The Murderous Mutes”. As clichéd as it sounds, due to the alliteration and use of definitive article, this group of people really did live up to their name. They found ways to get around their lack of speech, mainly in using various weapons to carve up people for their own enjoyment. Their main, and sickest, way of murder, was a knife slice across their victims throat to disable their voice for use in what they referred to as the afterlife. “The Murderous Mutes” believed strongly in an occult form of religion, which they referred to as “Mutism”. This was a made up word which they enjoyed thinking about while committing their murders, in the hopes of turning their fatalities to their religion. However, while they called themselves “The Murderous Mutes” and usually did what their name suggested, often they would use such powers of persuasion that they would convince the people to join this religion. In which case they would arrange for vocal box removal surgery to happen. This would lead to “The Murderous Mutes” becoming a rather powerful minority group, and Mike was who they wanted to become the next member.

So while Mike strolled on unbeknownst of what was about to happen, The Mutes, which is what we shall now refer to them as, were waiting for their chance. This chance could happen at regular intervals, as Mike was often seen ejecting his yellow cab in the venture of food in some seedy back alley from the forefront of a kebab truck. This was how Mike was brought up and it was how he would stay, even if his celebrity status suggested otherwise. And this day was no different, as Mike parked up on the side of the street, then walked down the same alleyway he had walked down many times before. Yet this time he wouldn’t be greeted by the same kebab van he’d seen many times before, he’d see The Mutes looking like regular people. Mike moved towards the van and started to fondle his pockets for change, before starting to voice his order. This was when The Mutes got angry. At the very sound of this previous mute speaking, The Murderous Mutes attacked and tied Mike up in the back of the phoney kebab van. While he struggled and kicked, The Mutes were communicating in the strange form of clicking language that had been once adapted by African tribes. Mike immediately realised what was happening after this, and that made him even more tense and nervy. The deed was going to be done; The Murderous Mutes were going to get their man. So they took out the trademark blade they had used so many times before and set themselves before chopping Mike’s throat. The only thing being, they never got to the second part. The Mutes set themselves and a special SWAT team burst into the kebab van and sliced the heads off each of The Murderous Mutes. Due to this being a major hit for them, The Mutes had put in the founding four members for the job. Yet while this was their strongest team, it was also their weakest. As the founding members of The Murderous Mutes were also the ones at largest risk, as if all four were beheaded within the same minute then the whole army that they had conceived would instantly return to the normality they had once been.

While the mutes were no more there was one man watching who failed to believe this. And he was one of the members of the SWAT team. Named Tom Martin Murphy, his name was changed to reflect the initials of The Murderous Mutes, TMM. Yet this was instantly as forgettable as it was memorable, and no one took any notice of poor Tom Martin Murphy. So when he burst in and beheaded those members of The Murderous Mutes, he was doing it for his own personal gain. Soon after he quit the police force and set about researching every move that The Murderous Mutes carried out in the hope of once copying their cult. Yet Tom Martin Murphy was a highly inane person, and after he left some blueprints of his plans at his old residence of work, he was beheaded.