Haha, shooting for a nerve ay?

I can definately understand what you wanted to accomplish with this piece, pure unadulterated shock value. I mean, on a superficial level you clearly achieved that goal, but on the other hand you leave a more intellectual reader thinking that you were running short on literary techniques. The contrasting slers were interesting, it could work anyway, one being that you were expressing an obtuse hate for everyone... But for me the subject matters oposition worked negatively(not the good kind) for you. I feel like if you picked one, catagory of individuals to really attack with more than just obesnity than the piece would have read alot stronger. To me, obsenity is nothing more than a word, it really pacts no true punch for me as a reader, but had you used sentances and lines that really ripped apart this group of people you could have been alot more offensive. I've written pieces that are meant to be obsene, yet that have minimal swearing, and the shock is in the approach of the topic and in the subject matter of the lines. So, this piece battles itself because a new reader taking a glance along superficial value would easily pick up the obsene objectivity of the piece yet they probally wouldnt see the great goal of the poem... And a more advanced reader really isn't going to find a simple word to be offensive in any way, because it's the delivery of a word that makes it offensive or acceptable, not nessisarily the word itself. Glad to see you back and writing though man.