The first time they ever caught me drunk was in grade 10. My buddy and I were out boozin all night and thought it would be a good idea to split a 40 oz of bacardi. bang, about half a bottle later in about 40 minutes (we mixed with oj to make screwdrivers) i was out cold. My buddy left about an hour after that, and passed out on some guys lawn. My mom found me at 9 am the next morning, buck naked in the middle of my bedroom floor, piss all over myself. she thought i took heroin or some shit. i then got into the shower, sat down in the tub, and just layed there for 30 minutes. then i got back up, crossed my piss-stained carpet. slept until 6 pm. then my dad woke me up and offered me a beer. good times.

now they let me drink all the time as long as they know where i am and who im with.

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Was he robbed of the ashphalt that cushioned his face?