alright this was weak, but i'll give you actual reasons why it was weak.

most of this verse didnt even rhyme, kind of a nessessary part of writing a rap verse.

this was a played to death topic, thugism has its place but its being done to death everywhere lately and 50% of illness is originality.

there was practically no wordplay, punchlines, multis, imagery or any little features of language and rhyme which could make this verse stand out.

thats why you need to elavate.

take a pen and a pad boys, this is CONSTRUCTIVE feedback.