End a they day, if your gonna get offended,then it will be used to offend.
As hard as it is, maybe when the words used to attack you, show no emotion,show no care, dont elaberate on it. Dont diagnose they moment they said it.

No reaction =no reason to say it.

As hard as that would be, cause I know personally, when someone disses my race (maori) all I want to do is swing a bat at them.

So yeh, the one using the word in a derogatry form, are wrong. So maybe try to not give a fuck and they will not have a reason to use it.
Stay getting all up in arms and they will see that by using the word they can fuck you off and know theres a reason to use it.

2cents