Hmmm, it sure isn't a nice 'enviroment' to be in....i'll testify to that..damn hoors...(!?)...

..but anyway, to the piece in a more technical sense....

..i felt it was too blunt...it didn't have the edge to it that would make it really leap out to the person reading it...no doubt here and there it had short 'bursts' of power....but overall, i felt the subject which you talked about, was met with too simple a structure, vocab and overall flow....

...i mean simplicity can usually be the most powerful of them all...but with all due respect, this one just didn't hit it off...

...still an alrgiht piece....and i can see talent, just gotta release it...er...no hate...

...respect..