True story:

One day I was walking a beautiful woman home and suddenly a pitbull who was raped by a man appeared across the street facing an alternate direction. Me and the beautiful woman backed in between two garbage cans of an ally and to the left of us was a sign that red "WARNING RAPED DOG CAN SMELL A PENIS THROUGH FABRIC, IT DOES NOT DETECT THE SCENT OF A VAGINAL OPENING".He had the ability to smell a penis through fabric and the very scent of a penis drove him crazy because it reminded him of the day his innocense was taken. So a lightbulb went off and I was like ok let me put my dick inside you so the dog won't come near us and she was like ok. I put it in and she did that bullshit "oh" thing and I was like STOP IT. And she was like "okaaay" and ah fuck it im not even gonna finish its gay