Been with Cash Money since age 11
quit frontin like it was cuz of your sick style and rhymes foo
cuz know we REALLY know how you got Baby to sign you!
fucking young ass bitch trying to fill veteran shoes
bitch please..
get on your knee's and bow, wow.. even he did ^ that better than you

vs.

so just resign as in quit dont re-sign a contract
return to the 8 mile and give your promoters their nine back

Dao, u came kinda inconsistent. U had a few cool bars like the ones I quoted, those were good. The rest, ur concepts were fine, but u need more wit to them. Follow this formula whenever u can at all times. Personal + Wordplay = Dope. Sometimes u can use just wordplay or just a personal to make a nice line, but often combining the two helps. For example, the brother/sister line, nice personal there, but u just stated it blandly. Try to combine some sorta cliche or wordplay to lead into the personal. Same with the cash money thing, good personal, but u needed something else to make it hit harder.

tiggo, was looking for improvement in this verse and I just didn't see it. You had a lot of personals, but like I told tiggo, not enough wit. In fact, u didn't really have any wit. U gotta learn to use wordplay n' shit to make ur stuff more interesting. 8 mile line was okay, u sorta did that there, but it was the only one. Ugly kid and fucked up ex wife, yea thats true, but all u did is state it blandly, u gotta add wit to it. Then, u also had a lot of generic shit like the fearin god shit and crew shit, that coulda been to anyone. No reason to not have a personal in every line here, especially since u got eminem to diss, one of the easiest dudes u coulda gotten. Sorry tiggo, maybe this isn't for u, but if u want me to work with u and help u elevate ur game, hit me up on AIM - DaTrusHurtz.

Vote - Dao