Irrational:
Your verse didn't seem like a topical that much. It seemed like a verse for Open Mic. You must have misunderstood what they meant by "Free Verse". The rhyme scheme was decent, but you didn't tell a story or have a topic. Okay verse tho.

Jay-Brook:
Your piece was good. You had emotion, content, flow. But most of all: YOU WROTE ABOUT A TOPIC!! I felt what you were talking about. Good job.

V/ Jay-Brook

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The Scholar