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Old 02-10-09, 12:28 PM   #11
King Solo
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I checked you posts dude, Your lines are all lame and generic
The dopest lyrics I saw you write are following Bobericc_
This was simple as fuck. It's a type of punch that doubles as a generic "your wack" diss and also flips on his name. The only problem is for this to be really effective you've gotta get creative and flip the shit out of it. Overall, it reads as more of a generic statement than a punch.

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mad played nameplays! one way, got your jaw in a foul crunch
trying so hard at tip, weak and get caught in an outter punch..
The wording on this was fucking strange. When reading a punch you see the commas and ... shit as a means of making a brief pause, which is then generally followed by you flipping what you said prior to the pause. You just seem to throw them in for pleasure and it fucks up the flow of the punch. That aside, it works as a generic punch although I'm not too big of a fan of these types of bars. I can overlook that and just say this is average.
he aint texting it raw,
wanted you to 'fill me in on your dopeness' and for sure,
..I fell through the emptiness with less than before!
Honestly, you didn't need the ' around the FILL ME IN ON YOUR DOPENESS to emphasize how you was going to flip the punch. Once you do that, the punch becomes predictable and loses power. Also, a generic way of saying he is not dope just doesn't cut it anymore. These kinds of concepts were flipped to death like 3-4 years ago and you still see them pop up from time to time, but they are just WAY TOO PLAYED now.

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your bad wording said, battling me made you less dope, now thats a fact
you say I got mad played lines?..........Bobericc, your dog gone whack
First off, you seem to have done the same thing with the commas. In the setup the first one is not needed because it brings an unnecessary pause that messes with the flow. Little things like that can fuck up the effectiveness of a punch. That aside, this punch was actually the only real one of the entire battle that had an element of harshness. I don't know if its gone over LPMNDCTE's head, because I saw he commented on how bob flipped it better. I found this shit funny because its true. He used that mega played wordplay and the way you worded your punch just had a strike of comedy to it.


Well, I see this battle differently. One had an average punch and a comic personal to end with that flipped bob's second punch nice. Bob really didn't attack One hard enough and came with a couple of average punches, one of them being MEGA FUCKING PLAYED AS SHIT!! I could care less if he thinks I'm voting against him because of last week, not that there is logic behind that coz One voted against me last week to, rofl. Either way, I've explained it as best as I can.. give you some pointers. Whether you choose to take them is up to you, just I've been battling now since like 2001 so I've pretty much been around and seen everything. It is a lot harder to come fresh these days, but its still possible.

Anyway..

VOTE: ONE WAY
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