Herb
|
IP:
Jon- Long piece. The topic was there clear enough, being able to pull a story out of the title was a plus. Felt like it kind of just meandered for the most part, like a lot of unecessary desciption and waiting around. The vocab and rhyme scheme were weaker than i've seen you do. The imagery was good though.
Bob- A rant piece but well put together. You conveyed your narrators dissatisfaction clearly and his self-confidence too. Your use of imagey and vocab were on point and the rhyme scheme was solid from start to finish. Felt like you could've expanded on the topic a bit more though.
Vote- bob, while jon had more of a narrative, bob was stronger in the other areas of the piece which was enough to tip the balance.
|