this was aight. but alot the time it just diddnt flow or rhyme. i see wat u were tryin to do wiv it but u diddnt execute it aswell as other times. e.g.

til its empty and out of order like your allowance was spent/
im checkin up on ya like i was a family member/
i'ma take ya life away like toys from christmas/

wheres the rhyme in those lines i couldnt find any. anyway i aint hatin this isnt a bad piece. ya vocab was quite good when it did rhyme and ya topic has got a point. anyway not hatin check mine shinobi life aight peace