why is the same bein who developed me, is tryin to indanger my life//
why is she so bent on makin my life struggle instead of somethin nice//
why must she make each day a tormented day of pain instead of paradise//
why does she claim where family when she treats me like im a differnt life form//
why does she call me son when she knows not who i was outward torn//
her words that she thinks helps me survive trutly are words of scorn//
i hate her yet love her while the time apart i dont mourn//
if only she knew she killed me the night she failed//
if only she knew i wished me death had only yet prevailed//
if only she knew i had nothin more to hold on then her soul vail//
she would have known her oldest child had yet to have grown a man//
she treats me like im a beast instead of the one did once come from her whomb//
i wish i would have visited my casket atleast i found love in my tomb//
my life shouldnt have started on oct. 27th instead yet began its own death//
which each thought that enters another chance at my finally breath//
if only the easy route i take my own life but what about my real family left//
my baby and her baby waitin for my livin soul that would be tru theft//
i made a life and to leave it like my mother would only be tru pain//
the turth is i got nothin to lose except my soul,hers and my babys to gain//
yet why would i wish such a nasty death upon my mother hands//
her words so movin as such a stars last remain fans//
why did she kill me yesterday with such unlovin hands//


only those who kno me will understand this poem it wasnt a well thought poem just a ease my mind one so please keep the hate to a min. thanx