not bad... you gotta work on longer lines, an' stringin' the lines together better.. u have some punches with no set up..

"I cut with razor blades//
like shoulder blades// <---- this has no purpose....?
See the line that i made//
down ur vertabrate//
Its ok//"

you could've shortened that down to 2 lines with puncuation such as comma's or semi-colans... that also shows a pause instead of a whole new line.... it flowed pretty well, an' u had some a'ight meta's in there as well.. keep elevatin'

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