Quote:
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the rights to sanity and good parting with their owner
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Incredible Line.
Quote:
and thats when i woke from the dream and emerged/
all the thoughts evolving from a sinister urge/
to sleep....................
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"to seep" haha, that was good.
Vote = fgee
But good work both of you. Keep up the good work.
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·Ok, now this is for
Kronox.
This doesn't really belong here. But fuck it. Anyone who doesn't like it can bite me.
You've got a lot of potential. But your lacking creaativity.
1. In thing like this your verse shouldn't involve your opponent, it made it seem like a battle more or less. (The league isn't involving "battle" verses). Now that doesn't mean
never use your opponent in your verse, but killing them isn't really original...
You had creativity in your lines, now all you have to work on is making everything creative.
(One thing I'd suggest you do that doesn't have anything to do with improving lyrical ability is, change your name. Their is 1 person who is fairly good on the net with that name. Try to come up with something that suits you, and you like...Only a suggestion)