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IP:
nice work man, though the little squiggly things pissed me off(~).
I can see why you wanted them there, to show a clear rhyme scheme, but that kinda took away from the piece. I always find it's better to make a rhyme scheme, then just write the piece normally and see if people catch on. It was a dope scheme though. In terms of content, it was pretty good, though I might have missed some because of the squigglies.
Your multis and wordplay were ill as fuck.
Best lines: (squigglies removed for my sanity)
We’ll be distraught imprecise when-we-spit,
And getting caught in-tha-lies envy-writ,
Thoughts-cracking in through tha-multies-and-vocab,
Allot-facts-being construed not-faulty-or-so-bad
(ill multi^)
They don’t-teach only paint vivid-scenes,
And outreach to taint wicked-dreams,
Keep droppin stuff like this, it's a good read(die squigglies die!)
Peace
__________________
Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis
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