Alright, this piece had a great concept with wonderful execution. I really enjoyed this piece, the metaphors and imagery were all wonderful. I do have a quibble with the structure. As I understand, the structure was intended to be stories in the order of Bryan, Katie, Brent. However, in one part, you seemed to have written Brent when it looks like you meant Bryan (Second grade show and tell line), and in the last stanza you bring for a whole new character of David. Maybe I'm reading something wrong but with this type of poem, consistency of structure is a must.

Otherwise, it was a good poem.