finally i saw something I liked.
Phrantik you had a good verse. None of that story shit it was solid and meant something. structured well, I liked it.
Good job.

Ali- the verse was pretty good... in concept anyway.
I don't like this whole interlude story telling stuff but I try to disregard it. your lines were too long that they lost the meaning of the detail in them. Work on being more concise in the writing that you do because the ideas have potential.

vote for phrantik

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I'm a goblin hooked on rails, stuck drinking ale/ I'll rip the horn out a unicorn and shove it up your fairy tale.