this was a nice peice. not great, or complex, or anything like that. but it was nice.
the dopest line I've heard since rapper's delight(not really, but still dope):
I take a breath in, its not air its sin.

I love that line. its uber ill lol.
anyways, this had a good feel to it, expressive of emotions, really felt you on this one. you should try to up wordplay and rhyming, because you rhymed obviously rhymable words. I could predict what word was coming next.
keep writing, it just keeps gettin better.
One

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Life isn't a bitch...
she's just sick of being personified -Sage Francis