I could've swore i replied to this before.

I guess i must've read it but was in too much of a rush to reply to it or something.



So here it is, Shizzy...


Written damn well. You seemed to cruise through the piece word by word...it kept me reading all the way through. You really got into the 'situation' and gave us a brief but important exploration into it. Imagery was subtle yet well done.

Though i felt the rhyme scene and how it was built up too was at times rigid. And made the flow slightly akward. that didn't matter much at all.

Also the lenght of the lines struck me as being too long at first sight. But the way it was written, as i read through it...it not only ceased to bother me..but i saw it becoming part of the piece. Part of how the piece was meant to be. You know, the 'art' of the piece in a way. Done like that on purpose for artistic reasons...

..anyway, that's enough said from me. I enjoyed this, you seem comfortable with a 'pen' (or keyboard) judging from this piece alone...

...resp...