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New to RB
From: Hillingdon (West London) |
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Suicide (Dedicated To Ma Brother)
IP:
Yo I wrote this poem today and I've tried and tried to write it for about 8 months now... but I've finally dun it... anyways here it is...
Quote:
Title = Suicide (Dedicated To Shaun)
Date = 08/07/03
By = Silky
My like is so fucked up, I'm going to say my good bye
I'm sitting her crying, thinking if I really should die
And join my brother Shaun, who lay up in the heaven
Died at the age of 16 a whole one year before I became 7
I can't remember how or why he died, for weeks I cried
I even prayed for him to come back believe me I tried
But after then I stopped trying, and even stopped crying
Because I hoped that at heavens place, he will be flying
Slowly I'm dying, I can't believe my need to be with him
For my living life to end, and my spiritual life to begin
I can't stop thinking, about committing this serious deed
I have no need, to be living, why am I alive is what I plead
In life I will not succeed, so why was I put on the earth?
Born and bred on Hillingdon turf, see me off in a Hurst
I'm haunted like a curse, what is the meaning of life worth
Why am I here, Why didn't my parents just kill me at birth?
Because then I wouldn’t be here thinking about these things
These horrible things, control my thoughts, suicide it brings
I can here the heaven angel sing, they are calling for me
I can't see them but I can hear them, they feel for me
But if I go there are many people I am leaving behind
I'm just going to name a few, which have come to mind
Mum & Dad:
You created me and I know it should be me burying you
But I've had enough of life, its time to start something new
Grateful for the life you've given me, but it’s not for me
So sorry for disappointing you, but all I was doing is being me
My Brothers (Chris, Gary, Matt, Mark, Neil, Ollie and Steve):
You all have been there for me, for that I can’t give you
Anything back, but I appreciate it very much, I swear its true
Always will I be thinking of all of you, and all my family
But I’ve got to go now, and don’t be thinking that I’m silly
Cassie (My Fiancée):
I'm sorry to say that I'm leaving now babe, I will miss you
Never forget the good times, and how I loved to kiss you
Just keep me in your heart, and remember that I care
I will live throughout you, all the time you keep me there
Jezz (Best Friend):
You've been a great friend to me, always thinking and caring
I loved it when we said shit, that we wasn't meant to be sharing
But that’s what true friends do, they can trust one another
This not the end its a new beginning, I'm going to see my brother
Risky (Best Friend):
Risky you know how I hate good byes, but it’s coming to the end
You were always there for me for everything, you’re a true friend
But you were there for me, but I can't return the favour at all
Because I'm committing suicide, sorry this selfish this is cruel
Munchie (Close Friend):
Munch munch, you know together we are a pair of true jokers
Don't give a fuck about haters, you know no one can smoke us
But now there wont be no 'us', because its the end of my life
I've forgotten my dreams about having a kid and Cass as my wife
Unit (Online Friend):
Unit I remember those funny times, on the Internet, u remembers?
How each day we'd fight to get referrals, you’re the best contender
I'm on every forum you own, would they be the same without me
Without this super-moderator, there’s no time left for Emcee Silky
All That I've forgotten:
I'm sorry if you didn't get your personal good bye, I am believe me
But just to let you know I'm going, why did my mum even conceive me
But this poem contains all my final words, before I call it a day
Decide not to commit suicide I may, but please for me don't pray
Now I've said my good byes, you’re wondering why I am doing this
Well you don't need reasons, because the only reason is a wish
A wish for me to see my brother once again, I miss him so dearly
I am not no crazy psycho, and you don't have any reason to fear me
The only reason you have, is to know that I love and miss Shaun
I hate it because he went like chess pieces he was the prawn
So don't care for me, love me, miss me, and mourn me, please
This is my plea for happiness, I am just here sitting on my knee's
About to pick up a knife, slit my throat and start a new living
So I do this *Slits Throat With Knife* and… *Silky’s Dead*
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OK This attachment is a picture of me writting this piece, dunt hate as it was fuking hard to write, and it mean 'A LOT' to me
Peace |