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Old 07-20-03, 04:48 PM   #7
Caramac
Tickle My Sloth
 
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Posts: 686
From: Wolverhampton, England
IP:

Nice piece Tony, flow was dope, nice
take on this topic actually, good rhyme
scheme, nicel=y structured, internals
and externals helped witht he flow, as
did your multi's. There were a couple
lines i felt were quoteable, but bash
mentioned my fave one, this was a
dope opener though:
Quote:
Everydays a nightmare, im lost in a glimpse of dreams..
So i wait till i die, not to rest, but to wake up in peace..
im sinking, and everyone in this world lets me be, as i..
Drown deeper in this ocean of sin, everytime i breath..

^Great way to open the piece up, set the tone nicely, good imagery, a nice little in-depth set up and flow was dope.

Nice piece my man, i just wish it was longer : (

Props.
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