Shiznit's Thoughts:

VOCABULARY/WORDPLAY:

>pretty impressive. The whole "terminology' was awesome. You've chosen in depth words that mostly revealed the actual aspect of the whole piece.
>metas thrown out... a couple of deep descriptive words here and there. props for that

FLOW
>it accompanied me smoothly as i read along the lines. Starting from the beginning until the end the stuffed much enhanced rhyme scheme was good. It fitted the whole verse all throught out. nice job!

CONTENT
>now thats what u can call an "imagery masterpiece". Its like its all there. The massive cryptic descriptive in tact of this piece echoed upon some kind of images inside my head...its quite brilliant!

"Try Picturing A Field Of Blood, Scattered w/ Shrapnel Shaves
Bodies twisted out of shape and with no help of being saved."

^^see what i mean.. These words explained everything. That it was well thought out and when u read it..its as if ur actually there and seeing all those images and on my opinion at some level of grossness. hehe..

>The emotions was all felt throughtout the piece. This made me think of the book i read.."Lord of the Flies"...its just about a bunch of kids got stuck in an island caused of a plane crash. It was very interesting...and as i read it...i thought of saving private ryan..just cause of the images on my mind ya know...

OVERALL..

>brilliant piece...the ending was swell..its good. It was worth reading. nice job!

__________________
<br><br><center>- Shiznit -
- Tampons are still expensive -
- That's a Fact - </center>