Shiznit's Thoughts:
Well here's the constructive critism that i promised...
here it goes..
VOCABULARY
>u seem pretty well used simple and plain words...u constructed them in a way that you wanted to just explain whats inside you. Your whole terminology doesnt really help much because it was self explanatory...
>it would been better if you put some metas and some metaphorical stuff in it..so the things that ur pointing out would be soo appealing to read..but either way..ur simplistic construction of words helped a bit.
FLOW
>it was smooth..nothing to improve much on it. U made it a point that the lines corresponds to its flow and as much as possible structured with this with such creativity of its rhyme scheme.. Reading it aloud would help to see if it would be off or not. Props for that.
CONTENT
>alright..i got the too emotional stuff on it. BUt on the way u executed ur words..uve expressed how much ur hurt and driven crazy by this girl..but im hoping that these powerful words wouldnt make ur perspectives change on women...i mean it doesnt mean that this experience turned bad..it would be the same as for the others..nope nope WRONG. Sometimes people are just the way they are and sometimes they change. Women are not same..same as guys...but ill assure you that there are soo many assholes out there...either males or females and just take it easy and be glad that u aint one of them....and try not to be..
OVER ALL
>it was nice to read...gotta love a guy who always bitch about girls...hehehe nahhh...i guess uve expressed ur feelings thoroughly and thats good. nice job!
Rhetorical Insights??....cmon....u know u can drop something on there...