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Old 08-06-03, 11:06 PM   #1
Nicanda
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Unfinished... lookin for suggestions.

IP:

Hey, I've been working on this poem, but I'm not sure what direction to take from here. I'm welcome to any comments or suggestions. Thanks.

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Take my hand and lead me
To a place that's beyond time
A faraway dimension
A place with true serenity
Full of hope, love and desire

A land with no disturbances
Just peace, and flickering fires
The flames will dance,
Mirroring your desire
Reflecting in your eyes

I watch them glimmer and sparkle
Captivating me in trance...
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