I can't say much about this, it's hard to explain...
It's an amazing poem, I see it, it's in my imagination as if I myself dreamt of it...The realisation of life's horror, in whatever form, the search, the journey made for another that shows the terror-struck truth...

I don't have much to say for improvement, in technincal terms, maybe the structure of stanza's could be more consistent...
But the inconsistency show's thoughts, fleeting and deep, this is a great poem of revealing something in your mind and stepping away in fear...
I say write a second part, this time face the fear, and dont revamp this, mistakes are what make us who we are, and there isn't anything to fix...