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Old 08-31-03, 12:25 PM   #5
varentao
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IP:

The history of repression and wrong doing of the 'white man' which haunts you to this day? Which remains your enemy? Because you being white, and all that on your shoulders living in a multicultural city? Maybe?

Well that's the main meaning i got out of it. And if it's the meaning you intended too. Then don't feel guilty about the mistakes your 'ancestors' made. Cos you're more enlightened, and instead help strive towards bringing further equality and what not. And remember, it's not just about 'the white man', but the human race in general. Just the europeans (through enviroment and many wars) latched onto it at the right time. And were able to exploit it. (well along those lines, you get the point...humanity is the larger picture..).

The piece was well compressed. Lines put together in a clever and echoing manner. Not putting too much emphasis on the repeating of 'my'. Which is usually the downfall of many who try the repetition style. You kept it doing, kept it flowing.

I felt the last lines could've been varied. Not in meaning, but in how you put them. Keeping with th whole piece.

Very nice read.

....resp...


EDIT: Just saw he's banned. Oh well. Wonder what for though.
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