Yeah. .
i thought this piece was actually pretty decent, it flowed good to me as i read it, it could of used more internals and multi's but this seeemed like it came from the heart, it was something YOU wanted to adress, and that really shone through in this piece. i liked how at time, you'd start the lines with the same beginning words, hat really built up the emotion in the lines, and i felt that

all in all a decent piece my man, just try working on those internals and multi's, you'll get better with practice.

Peace!

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