its needs some work... but its a good metaphore i like it... you have some good potential... i'd like to see some more stuff writin by you... god job dawg


never had no previous job experience fuck a 9 to 5
i strive to survive, trying to make ends meat off the lyrics i contrive
rappers better swallow there pride and just thank god there alive
thank god there not one of the sick or deprived
thank god they made it out of the hell from which they derived
^^^^^good shit