JournaLLL: Week One - Room to Improve

Week One of the revamped LLL, under the supervision of Evolve, is in the books . Taktik surprisingly gave Camarac a run for his money - baron mind, 'tik version 2.0 was the overwhelming under-dog. Dezyir's replica user-name found a way to slip past Jae Cyph . . oh wait, it was a damned no-show! Quotient impressed in his Lightweight Championship victory. Mystery~Murdera's return to the league was impressive, Ricochet dominated, Chrit was victorious and . . What's this? We have Breaking News into the LLL News Center.

RalphsBagels: you'll be interviewd very soon
Camarac: ahhhh
RalphsBagels: will you be on, or would you prefer doing it now ?
Camarac: me, interviewed?
RalphsBagels: yes
RalphsBagels: you're the freakin' champ, a-hole
Camarac: i signed out
Camarac: and wont be signing back in
Camarac: so actually, im not champ
Camarac: Taktik is
Camarac: = )
RalphsBagels: the hell?

Unfortunately, the rest is confidential L. Now, on to the magazine!

Week's BEST .

Camarac - The man of a thousand aliases continues to be at the helms of Arby's text leagues. Unfortunately, he decided to take it upon his hard-headed self to sign out of the league. So, everybody AIM him and tell him to come back. Like . . . now!

Dezyir - Captures Middleweight gold, in the process, releasing some killer punches like so:
"birthdays are good, i like cake
cleaning the lawn? get a rake!"

Mystery~Murdera - Looks to please the contingencies of adoring fans who are still sweating his Bars of War championship. I must admit, I was surprised by the Word Perfect-recruit's showing as he absolutely dominated Phixion.

Week's WORST .

Shrapnel - Composed, perhaps, the worst vote in Arby history in the Camarac/Taktik Heavyweight match. Unfortunately, this one isn't in the archives, for it was edited quicker than Evolve's LLL Office typing errors.

Young P. - Was kicked out of the league in the LLL's first-ever probation match. Not to mention, his opening line slandered John Street - all-American Democrat . . bastid!

Jae Cyph - No-showed in his Middleweight championship match-up. Come on now, Cyph . I figured at least one of your aliases would have accidentally graced us with a few lines.



Punches of the WEEK .



1.) RB Kids think I fell off, but here's something that's true
They ignore the fact that if I fell, I'd only land on you
Quotient

2.) fuck shouting & slang, doubting my name but i dead rivals,
only time ur names coming before mine is in this threads title!
Camarac

3.) Fagget Couldnt Spit Hot, Drinkin Lava And N Rhymin In Miami,
Coz His Career Aint Going Nowhere Like The Guy In My Avy/
Phixion

4.) Evolve I Understand, First Week, I Should Get A Bye At First
But This Kid Shoulda Ran His Fictitious Career Backwards N Retired First
Mystery~Murdera

5.) Please! who the hell made these battles.. wait, i believe it was I
cause i dont believe in Luck.. that's why im seeded w/ a Bye
Evolve

6.) Served ya up, cream of puff, bring on someone decent next
& I'd have used a G.Hod nameflip, but kid uses 9/11 for pity sex
Quotient

7.) cant defeat me. . u aint renowned for shit, just a confounded vet
ya sig still says blessed with skills.. well, u haven't found em yet..
Feeble Minded

8.) End and Sureal already left... so pack ya bags and follow suit/
Why does RB need an audio head who's shit sounds best on mute/
Chrit

9.) immensive speech, makes your flow look like a good joke/
cuz you never grabbed a mic, and thats the bottom line like a footnote/
Syntax Mastery

10.) Ur gay Tik. say my alias and you wont be breathing bitch,
cause i checked in with 'The Win' - and thats what im leaving with!
CamIraq

11.) Biters keep a Low Key, & even his Name half trys to Lower Its Case ,
This Lick Ass don't wan't War, Shrapnel literally means Blowin' The Waste!
Ricochet

12.) PMs Me Saying That's Hes Dope…Why Don't You Rap Right Then?
Cam's Style Dosent Evolve…Hes Still Hanging On Hyphens! (1)
A2Z

13.) Thank God You Stopped At 12 Lines, We Couldn't Handle More Idiocy..
I Nearly Laughed To Death At Ya Weak Lines But Ya Still Aint Killin Me..
Mystik Mind

14.) Left petrified, next to wreck this guy, Rac's the next vet to die...............
Joined WB to Run The Block...cept he thought it meant Exercise!!!............
Taktik

15.) Ya Nearly Cleared Me.. But Ya Punches Are No Good, So I'm In To Get Rid Of This Pinch Hitter..
Ima Spit Liquor To Ya Persona, Cuz Threes' Company..U Got No Heart Like John Ritter..
Auspicious

Odds and ENDS .

I've been cool with Mystery~Murdera since my first days at Arby, but my boy did make the ultimate screw- up this week . . I can not believe that not one voter caught it. Proof-read boys & girls!

"And Its Time Ur Lil Gay Tag Team Gets Tagged Up
Da Alphabets Got 24 Letterz But I Got A Whole Verse To Match Up."

How many letters?! AHHHha! Plus, I'd like to send words of encouragement to Phixion and Cameronj86. I've noticed that you two have been elevating immensely, keep at it, fellas. Good luck to everybody next week - and remember - send Camarac as many IMs as possible!

-G.Hod